The good in girly

I have a 3.5yr old daughter. She loves pink. She loves sparkles. She loves dresses, and most especially dresses that go all the way down to her toes – like a princess! 

I have spent the past 3.5yrs trying not to cringe when she asks for another necklace to wear, another sparkly headband or crown. 

I would rather she go play in the dirt. Focus less on being “beautiful” and more on being strong.

In essence, I have spent the past 3.5yrs trying to guide her away from being “girly”. 

But this morning, I read an article by Kristen Bell which has given me pause. In it, she asks, “why is being girly a negative adjective?”.

Kristen Bell starts by making the controversial statement, that men and women are not equal.  Should we have equal power? Yes. Should we have equal opportunity? Yes. But are we the same? No.

“There are differences – inherent and unwavering differences. For the majority of the human timeline, these differences were openly viewed as female weaknesses; crating a chasm between men and women.”

“I’d like to add my voice to so many voices who have chosen to flip the narrative and see these disparities as beautiful, unconquerable and inspiring.”

Bell argues:

“This ever-long journey toward equality demands that we, as females, actually embrace our inequalities and value them as superpowers.”


So today, I embrace my daughter’s girly-ness. I embrace her sensitivity, her astounding empathy. She is thoughtful, caring, intuitive.

She can sense if one person in a room full of adults is not happy. And then, she thinks up creative suggestions to help.

She is also strong. And aggressively protective of her little sister. She is brave, and I know this because she can articulate when she is feeling scared to do something, and yet she gets up and does it anyways.

She is my girl. My girly girl. And this weekend we will put on our sparkly princess crowns in all of our girly glory, and play in the dirt.

2 thoughts on “The good in girly

  1. Em,
    I love this post! For some reason I haven’t been getting emails notifying your new entries. Tony just sent me a recent email he received, so here I am looking back over what I have missed. You are a good writer and thinker and photographer…..AND mother to a beautiful strong, sensitive, girly girl. ❤

    Like

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